28 February 2020

Live life well...today

This morning I awoke to news of more deaths from coronavirus and wondered how long it would be before it was titled an international pandemic. Then I reflected again on Kobe Bryant and the others in that helicopter. Their death came so suddenly. Then I received a notice from my high school class (we graduated 700 in 1969) that another classmate had passed away this week. In summary, this could be depressing, but it isn't.

Of course, there is sadness. Of course, there is weeping. Of course, there is the reminder that life is ephemeral and won't last much longer. That in itself could drive some to drink and curse the day they were born. Since we are all going to die, let's eat, drink and waste ourselves. So some conclude.

But if any of you who reads this blog knows me at all, you know that I'm a glass-half-full kind of guy. You know that I'm keen to make the best of any and all situations if that's possible. Not a Polyana, but an optimist, to be sure.

So when I read of all this dying, and ponder what might have been with the Swine Flu or SARS or what might be with corona, it's a time for personal reflection. I want to live in the now, not in the fear of the future.

They say today is a gift, that's why they call it the 'present.'

That's not only for a Chinese fortune cookie; that's for me ... today! How will I live today? What will I do?

The 12-step folks have a 12-thought reading called "Just for Today." I share it below in full and hope that it helps you as it has helped me to live in the present.

Yesterday is gone; it's not coming back. So all my frustrations and self-kicking are gone. My regrets can be instructive, but yesterday is a bad day in which to live. The past at best gives me haunting or regrets. Or pride in accomplishments. None of that works for me.

Similarly, tomorrow never comes. No wonder the image about free beer makes sense. Hope matters and I don't want to demean those who live in hope. But the dwelling only in tomorrow in such a way that you miss out on today makes no sense.  Plans matter; a wise man has to make plans. But to live only in the future is unwise.

I'm not talking about the Grass Roots' wrong evaluation of "Let's live for today." Their dismissal of future planning is not in my view. I'm talking about living well today, making the best of situations in front of me today.

I'm letting the deaths of others remind me to live well today.
On my Facebook today in light of another classmate's passing, I wrote, "Some of our class were well known; others less so. But in his life, Bruce sounds like he made a difference in the lives of others, and that's to his credit. And to me, that's a good reminder to keep helping, keep reaching out, keep loving people. We all have a 'use-by' date... let's make a difference in someone's life today."  


Maybe that comment will put this in perspective and maybe it will help you as well.

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Just for Today:
1. Just for today, I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle my whole life's problem at once. I can do things for 12 hours that would appall me if I had to keep them up for a lifetime. 
2. Just for today, I will be happy. This assumes that what Abraham Lincoln said is true, that "most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." Happiness is from within; it is not a matter of externals. 
3. Just for today, I will try to adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my family, my business, and my licks as they come and fit myself to them. 
4. Just for today, I will take care of my body. I will exercise it, care for it, nourish it, not abuse or neglect it so that it will be a perfect machine for my bidding. 
5. Just for today, I will try to strengthen my mind. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought, and concentration.
6. Just for today, I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn and not get found out; I will do at least two things I don't want to do, as William James suggests, just for exercise. 
7. Just for today, I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress as becomingly as possible, talk low, act courteously, be liberal with praise, criticize not at all, nor find fault with anything -- and not try to regulate or improve anyone. 
8. Just for today, I will have a program. I will write down what I expect to do every hour. I may not follow it all exactly, but I will have it. It will eliminate two pests: hurry and indecision. 
9. Just for today I will have a quiet half-hour all by myself and relax. In this half-hour sometimes I will thank God, so as to get a better perspective of my life. 
10. Just for today, I will be unafraid, especially I will not be afraid to be happy, to enjoy what is beautiful, to love, and to believe that those I love, love me.

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