If I could speak with.... Rita Rudner

I first saw Rita Rudner in the early 1980s in NYC on the David Letterman Show. She was very funny, and about my age, so I took a liking to her. My wife and I laughed at times out loud! My favourite line from her then was, "I don't have any children... that I know of." She was dry, subtle, clever, clean, and in a time when filth was growing in popularity, hers was refreshing on many levels.

Where did she go? She made it as a successful author, Las Vegas entertainer, and didn't have to continue in the work she had studied and aimed for a career: song and dance on Broadway. Like my daughter, she had studied ballet from the time she was four. And her career worked to land on the stage in NYC. But she evaluated her life as 'less', and she wanted something that would sustain her, and she had always made people laugh, and found that pleasurable. So she gave it a go, and voila, it worked.

I found an interview of her wiih a Detroit newsperson from two months ago and watched with smiles and internal laughter at her continued self-effacing and personal unpacking of difficulties in navigating the world of today. I'm sure those lines were part of her shtick but they came off as off-the-cuff. Timing. It's a key to her comedy.

If I could speak to her, I would ask about the line, "I"m trying to learn new things in my life." Of course, that would include things like computer skills and cooking classes, perhaps, but I wonder if religion, and reading the Bible, not only Torah, but also the New Testament, also written by Jews, might be of interest to this Miami-born Jewish woman?" I'd like to discuss new things.

If I could speak to her, I'd ask about suffering. She was quoted in a San Francisco newspaper a decade ago about Jews and humour and said, "Humor comes from being oppressed — there’s nothing funny about everything going right; things have to go wrong to be funny, and Jews are no longer the only ones who have something to complain about." She was indicating why Jews aren't the mainstay in comedy any longer, but I'd ask her what sufferings she endured that helped frame her exceptional observational comedy and humour.

If I could speak to Rita, I'd ask about the Christmas tree/ Gentile in the house thing. Her non-Jewish stepmother brought in the tree, and when Rita was a teenager, she moved away from Florida to NYC and said, "You can keep the Christmas tree." And yet, Rita married a British man who is not Jewish. So, does she still disregard the combo holidays in December? Does she miss any spinning dreidels or fattening latkes? Maybe we would speak about the miracles of Christmas and the miracle of Hanukkah, and if she even believes in miracles. 

Those are some of my current thoughts and who knows, one day she'll be playing the Ryman in Nashville when I'm there, or a playhouse in Sydney or... you never know, but you can be sure, I will smile a lot if I would speak with her. She's that funny; she's worth going to see her. Before Nate Bargatze, whose observations on life are epic, there was Rita Rudner. 

Her image in 2025

Thirty Million Minutes: Dawn French, Billy Crystal and memories

Last night I went to see Dawn French (Vicar of Dibley) in a one-woman stage show with the name 30 Million Minutes. It was the story of her 58 years, which amount to almost 50 million. Give or take a few thousands. After a few minutes I was reminded of another stage show I saw of the same ilk. Billy Crystal, starred on Broadway and we saw that one. 700 Sundays tells the stories of his youth, growing up in the jazz world of Manhattan, his teenage years, and finally adulthood. The Tony Award-winning show is a funny and poignant exploration of family and fate, loving and loss.

Billy's title comes from the 15 years worth of Sundays he and his father Jack Crystal shared before Jack died. Dawn's story was similar in length, in production, in video retrospective, and in pain of searing loss. Both of their dads died when the kids were teens. Both come from very loving families. But while Crystal's show would have been rated PG, Dawn's family history was rated MA-15, to be sure. I know way too much about sexuality from her, and her body parts. This, by the way, is NOTHING compared to the raunch of Brad Garrett (Everybody loves Raymond) which I witnessed in Melbourne two years ago. (For the photos from there, see my Flickr site here

Still, "I remember" was a major phrase in both stories. Certainly in Dawn's story telling. And her stories were great, of her grandmothers, of her dad, her mom, brother who still is at the ready to listen to her, and so many dots on her family notations. The Queen Mother's visit, Dawn's rocking horse fence, her marriage and its breakup...all are introduced with "I remember."

As Jewish people, we have many ways to remember things. Straps of leather wrapped around our arms in the morning, strings attached to major body garments, wedding rings, even lit plaques are all designed to call to mind former things.

Triggering memories is useful if you want to gain from the past.
Memories are useless if you want to live in the past.
The past is a great place from which to have come, but a poor substitute for the future.

When I say the word "memory" what is your first thought? Your childhood? Yesterday's lunch? The game you won? The pass you dropped? Learn from those moments, or those years. And let's become the people we should be, with learning accomplished and hope established.

Bennett Arron: Jewelsh

This Jewish comedian is from Wales and performed at the Canon's Gate pub in Edinburgh during the Fringe Festival. I went to hear him on his first night, the 18th. He'll continue until the 29th.

Part of his shtick is that he's both Jewish and Welsh. And he talked about the underlying effects of being each. I laughed out loud at times. The 10-year-old blended Benromach helped me get in the mood. Fact: It's 10 Years Old Single Malt Scotch Whisky (43% ABV)

Back to Bennett. Early on in his monologue, he mentioned "Jews for Jesus." Yup, out of nowhere he said something like, "One thing we know about Jews is...we don't believe in Jesus." That in light of his saying that we aren't exactly sure what we do believe as Jews. OK, same old, same old, and no offense taken by me.

He mentioned that Jews for Jesus try to make converts to their point of view and that this is something Jews don't do. Again, a minor mistake historically as there are times in Jewish history when some have taken the phrase of being a "Light to the nations" so seriously that proselytism is the natural result. But again, not the main point of this blog.

He went on to other subjects and kept me laughing along with the other 35 or so in the pub's cellar.

A few minutes later, Bennett mentioned that he personally believed in God and wondered if there were any other religious people in the crowd. (Hard to call 35 people a crowd, but hey, it's tough competition at the Festival. Hundreds of gigs and performers. All of his gigs are listed here

So Bennett asks if anyone is religious. A lady near me half-raises her hand, and I lift mine with relative ease. He sees the motion in my arm and calls on me. I'm in the 3rd row.

"What religion are you?" he queries.

I pause the pregnant comic pause. I replied, "You won't believe this." I increase the volume of my reply. And bounce it off the already-low cellar ceiling.

"I am the director of Jews for Jesus in Sydney Australia."

The crowd must have thought Jewelsh was now a two-man show. What else could explain this sudden segue? But of more consequence (with apologies to the crowd) was the non-response of Bennett. He was seriously taken aback.

"You're serious?"
"Yup."
"That's awkward," he continued.

He came back to it another one or two times, but the impact was made.

After he finished his set, about 40 minutes later, with more continued funny bits and stories, he took his orange pail for donations and stood at the back of the room. Everyone was asked to put in some coins or better, a 5-pound note.

I happily took out a fiver and my business card and after turning in my emptied Benromach glass, approached the comic.

He put out his hand from under the pail and we had a real moment of mutual appreciation. It was great. After the last of the others left, we chatted for another 5 minutes, as I had to get to another show, about 8 minutes away. We traded business cards officially, as you do. We asked the barmaid to shoot us in this photo.

I tweeted that people should go see Jewelsh. I am now blogging that people should go see Jewelsh.

And I"m hopeful that Bennett, the father of two wonderful kids, and husband of one good wife, he says, will continue to consider what God might be saying to him, about this encounter and how Jesus wants to have a personal relationship with him.

And with you, dear reader.